Always You

You’re always there. Every other woman is you; every romantic female character is you; every desire, still you. The void that you left remains unfilled. The longing is still there; to touch you, hold you, kiss you.

But I never will. Even though you still call me. Even though you’re still intrigued by my life. Even though the attraction is still there and keeps you coming back. I will never take you in my arms again.

I couldn’t risk that. And besides, I know you now. I can’t look into your eyes knowing what I know. I was a fool who ignored the truth of you.

But still, it’s always you.

Gurkha Justice Campaign update from Joanna Lumley

The following is from an e-mail I received 21st May 2009:

At midday today, Home Secretary Jacqui Smith made the announcement to the House of Commons that the Gurkha Justice Campaign have been fighting for for years. All ex-Gurkhas who have served more than 4 years in the British Army will have the right to settle in the UK if they wish.

After such a long fight, with huge ups and downs, this is a superb announcement.

We simply would not have won this fight without the massive, overwhelming support of all those who have supported our campaign. To the hundreds of thousands of people who have signed Gurkha Justice petitions, lobbied their MP, campaigned, attended rallies and marches – thank you so much to you all. This is your victory. It would not have happened without you.

The Government has now responded to that campaign after court cases, votes in Parliament, a huge media campaign and, most importantly, massive public support. I am delighted, and humbled, at what has been achieved by our remarkable team.

The whole campaign has been based on the belief that those who have fought and been prepared to die for our country should have the the right to live in our country. We owe them a debt of honour – a debt that will now be paid.

With warmest good wishes,

Joanna

A National Disgrace

Gurkha’s have fought alongside British servicemen for over 200 years with distinction. But sadly, the British Government has failed to honour these brave soldiers and is not allowing them to live in Britain. This is what Joanna Lumley has to say. I would urge any British readers to use the link and fill out the petition, which will take you a few seconds at most.

Already, tens of thousands of people have signed: an extraordinary response
in support of an extraordinary group of people.

We demand the full, fundamental change in law that will allow all retired
Gurkhas the right to live here. The Government’s decision on 25th April
goes nowhere near far enough. Many thousands of Gurkhas who served our
country will still be refused the right to live here.

The High Court demanded new rules from the Government. The Government’s
response has been awful. We must be clear. We want the right for all
Gurkhas who have served this country to live here if they wish.

To make the biggest possible impact, we really need more people to sign up:
lots more. We need to form one of the biggest ever campaigns to force the
to change their mind and to show our support for the Gurkha cause.

Your support for the campaign is a fantastic boost: thank you so much. But,
if possible, I need to ask you to help to encourage others to sign.

Firstly, ask all of your friends and colleagues to sign up to the Gurkha
Justice Campaign at Gurkha Justice Campaign – please do forward them this
email, or email or contact them directly yourself.

And secondly, you can now download a petition form for signing from
Gurkha Campaign Petition. Please download
and print some copies, and ask friends and colleagues who have not signed
on line to sign up. Please do pass it round (some friends of mine have run
street stalls asking people for their signatures – I’m not asking you to
go that far!) and return completed sheets to me at the address on the form
as soon as possible.

I will be in touch again in the near future with other ways you can help:
I hope you will be able to do so.

Finally – thank you again for your support. Together, we must finally right
this wrong.

With warmest good wishes,

Joanna Lumley
for the Gurkha Justice Campaign

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Ringo’s Rant

The talentless, ex Beatle, Ringo Starr (silly made up name) recently ranted on his web site, telling fans not to send any e-mails as they wouldn’t be read or answered, as he is far too busy!

Starr is by far the most pretentious of the Beatles (followed by Sir Paul McCartney), Starr actually believes he is a creative genius.Has anyone ever heard a drummer say one of his influences was Ringo Starr? Does anyone own a Ringo Starr Band album? No, me either. Starr is most famous for being the voice of Thomas the Tank Engine (an animated steam train). The prosecution rests…

Here’s a message for Mr. Starr: Pull yer head in you plonker – Peace and love, peace and love; peace and love!

Erica Campbell Finds God…

I only found this out today on another blog. I’ve always been a big fan of Erica Campbell; I love her sweet, girl next door smile and beautiful eyes. I’m going to paste in her statement, so you can read it yourself if you wish.

I’ve noticed a lot of spiteful, nasty comments on other blogs and forums. It’s like some guys either feel that their property has been stolen or just don’t like the idea of her switching sides. The latter are usually pseudo-intellectual types who think they’re smart because they’re atheist and anyone with a religious faith is primitive by comparison. The former are just wankers – literally, I guess.

Personally, I wish Ms. Campbell all the very best. I can see how being a glamour model and porn star (not sure about that title, but not my words) would be rather soul-destroying; being objectified and only noted for something as arbitrary as physical beauty and a “nice wrack”.

The sad thing is that images and videos of an adult nature have a certain immortality; especially when someone is as popular as Erica Campbell is. They will be around for a very long time. They will most likely outlive Erica herself. I hope her previous life leaves her alone as much as possible, but I can imagine that other people who are either exponents of pornography or aficionados will not hesitate to throw it back in her face should she decide to speak against it.

The Statement:

The Only Way Out

This message is to ALL of my friends and fans. I wasn’t sure how exactly to start this…but I trusted that God would help me write this and maybe through me I could speak His word and make His will be done…..

For a long time I have been very lost. So lost in myself and in the world that I didn’t even REALIZE that I was lost. I have always thought of myself as a pretty good person. I love helping people, I love befriending people, I love animal rescue and rehab. I care a GREAT deal for my friends and family and ALWAYS do whatever I can to care for them and make sure that they are ok. For a long time I THOUGHT that I was doing the right thing…..and doing my personal best……well…I was wrong…dead wrong.

Being in the world of adult modeling I see A LOT of pain….A LOT of heart break. SO many lost girls get into this business just for some extra money….to help pay for school….to help support themselves or even their children as single moms. “It’s just temporary”. They are only going to do this for a while…just a few shoots.
I too started out to make some extra money to help me finish school. Almost ALL of the time It doesn’t end where you think it will…..the path goes on……the hole gets deeper….and the road gets darker. MOST of the time the girls don’t even realize it. One day you see this bright beautiful girl shooting tame nudes…the next they are signing on the dotted line of a hard-core porn company. Lost. Broken. Alone.

I being on the other side of these pictures you don’t see the pain these girls are in. The struggle….the drugs that they take so they can get themselves through these sets. Sometimes it’s just a show….you pretend to be someone else..become someone you never thought you could be…and the hole gets deeper.

I never thought of myself as one of these girls. What I have been doing “wasn’t porn”. I connect to well and so close with so many of my fans. I didn’t realize what I was doing or why.

The past few years have been very difficult for me. That is no secret to anyone that knows anything about me. I have been working my tail off to support myself, my farm, my rescues, my family, and the list goes on. No matter how hard I worked…..no matter how many people or creatures I helped I STILL had that void inside of my heart and my soul. Connecting with person after person through my site as REAL FRIENDS. I understood the loneliness of the people that I would talk to…because I myself was so lonely. The more I shot…the deeper my darkness got…..the more I understood the pain of others. My friends and my fan. There is ONE common thread to so many of us online here…..the need to be loved, accepted, cared for, the need to have SOMEONE understand you and connect with you. At the end of so many of these emails was that loneliness. SO many men have asked me what they were doing wrong, how to find a special girl like me for THEM. How to fill that “void” in their hearts…in their souls. For a long time I thought I was helping to fill that void in the lives of so many, and in a way I was. But it was all a lie. I could never fill that void for anyone…only be a sinful band aid for it. Only cause the loneliness to deepen….only cause my own soul to ache more.

I have been looking so long and so hard for someone to love me. Love ME for ME. Fill that hole in my soul. Complete me. All this time the only thing standing in my way was me. I have been blind and wrong. On so many levels for so long.

I have decided to leave the world of adult and porn behind me….and follow the lord. I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and am devoting my life to HIS WILL. I have found the one thing that can, will and DOES fill that void…and that’s GOD.

I have been trapped in sin and destruction for so long. Disappointment after disappointment……painful venture after painful venture. I have been my own worst enemy. Holding the key all along that could set me free from the darkness that had slowly enveloped me….that was eating away piece by piece my soul. Burning the light out of my eyes so slowly that I didn’t even see it….didn’t know it…..

It is will a new clarity and a new purpose that I will continue my life. I WANT TO HELP THESE GIRLS! These lost souls…..these girls that are ABUSING THEMSELVES. Selling themselves for NOTHING. I want to help them STOP THIS PAIN. I want to show them the light…..and the love of Jesus. ONLY HE CAN FILL THIS VOID IN THEIR LIFE! HE IS THE WAY….THE ONLY WAY.

I also want to help my fans…my friends……This void in your life and heart. You seek pornography to fill it….it’s only a bandage. Sin isn’t ugly….it’s beautiful. It can’t fill the voids in your life. ONLY GOD CAN FILL THEM!

I love my fans, and I love YOU. I want YOU to feel this peace. I want YOU to get out of the darkness that is all around you. You can not live with one foot in Christ and one in the world. Our time here is so short….today could be your last day here. And what will you have lived for? Died for? There is only one way to heaven and eternal life….and that is through Jesus.

I will not and can not desert my friends and fans. The models…..the world. I can’t and I won’t. I am hoping that the Lord will work through me and guide me to do HIS will and help those that I can. Those that will stop and listen….those that will allow the Holy Spirit to fill them and speak to them as it has me.

I know that there are going to be a lot of people that will think this is a big joke….laugh…..wonder if I have lost my mind….well….I have news for you…. FOOLS MOCK THE TRUTH. There is ONE WAY. And only one way. I have found that way. I have FILLED THE HOLE IN MY SOUL! Filled that void that I couldn’t fill with anything else. My life isn’t about ME anymore…..My life is about God and HIS will. I want to spread HIS love. Tell people about Him……lead people home to Him. I don’t care what you have done…..how lost you think you are….how hopeless you think things are……I HAVE GREAT NEWS FOR YOU! It’s NOT TOO LATE. God LOVES YOU! He wants YOU. All you have to do is accept His gift. IT’S RIGHT THERE FOR YOU! Jesus died on the cross for OUR SINS. The price for us has already been PAID IN FULL.

I will not be attending glamourcon or shooting anything else. The next and last person that will see and enjoy my body will be a husband AS GOD INTENDED! I have asked for forgiveness for what I have done AND HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN! I will spend the rest of my life doing the Lords will and the Lords work. I AM HIS!

I want you ALL to know that I love you very much…..you ARE MY FRIENDS! I want you to know God…..I want you to get out of this darkness…this saddness and follow the word of God. There is ONLY ONE WAY OUT!

I will not abandon you……

As always my email address to ALL of my friends and fans is: ericarosecampbel@aol.com. I understand that this is coming as a complete surprise to my loyal members who have joined my new site to support me and my new venture. I totally understand if you would like a refund for your membership. Please email me at: ericafanclub@gmail.com for a complete refund.

My life is beginning NOW. From this day on I will live HIS will and HIS way. My heart is HIS.

Serving Christ,

Erica

Have Americans got the courage to vote for change?

As many of you may have seen, there are a lot of humorous videos on You Tube about the forthcoming American election and the candidates for president and vice president. I’ve been thinking about writing a post on this subject for some weeks, but either didn’t get round to it or wasn’t sure what my angle was going to be.

Now I know what I want to write about.

I want to ask a particular question: have Americans got the courage to vote for change or will they plump for the familiar?

Well, if history serves, I believe they’ll do the latter. Americans seem to be very much for Obama at the moment. A great majority of us who don’t get a vote in November would like to see Obama in the White House also.

But when it comes time to place that mark against a name, won’t most Americans have a final thought about things and lose their nerve? Also, the Christian Right in America is already gearing up for an all out assault on the Democrat candidates. The Christian Right see the election in a very narrow way; sexuality and abortion. I was listening to one Christian commentator who was speaking against Barack Obama because he described himself as a world citizen during his visit to Germany. She called it the Spirit of Antichrist.

I don’t care whether Sarah Palin believes the Earth is 6000 years or 6 billion. Science has not proved the age of the Earth or the galaxy. It has theories and calls them fact. Evolution is a theory too. There is no concrete proof for creation or evolution. If someone has a religious faith or is an atheist or an agnostic, it shouldn’t preclude them from taking part in politics.

If she’s anti-abortion that’s her prerogative in a free country. Some people use the old argument that if she’s against abortion then she’d force a woman who is raped to go full term and have the child.

Let’s look at that for a moment. If a woman gets raped and becomes pregnant does it follow that the child has to be aborted? Rape is a terrible, terrible crime; it’s violent and hateful; traumatic and the damage is lasting. These things are not in question. Any woman that has been raped I have the greatest sympathy for and I know quite a few who have been. But, a life has been created here, however brutally. Doesn’t that life have rights too? Well, this post isn’t about abortion, it’s about an election. Women already have the right to have an abortion in the US.

From my point of view, this election is about how America views and interacts with the rest of the world. Most Americans know little or nothing about the world outside their borders; and worse, they don’t actually care. If it isn’t covered by the stars and stripes, fuck it, who cares…

I was recently talking to a black American man online about the up-coming election and he said to me: “I’m black and I’m not gonna vote for Obama.” The obvious question escaped me at the time. Why is it relevant that this man is black? Because in America the divide between black and white is still great. They may pay lip service to equal rights and racial equality, but when the chips are down, the old prejudices come out. Will white America really vote a black man into the White House? I don’t think so.

I believe Obama is the best candidate, although I was impressed with McCain during the recent debate. Well, after George W. Bush, McCain would seem urbane, in touch and intelligent, wouldn’t he? I feel that the world needs to see a new America; a less arrogant and ignorant America; an America that actually helps the world rather than plunging it into war after war and bullying countries out of their resources. I also believe in the special relationship between America and my country; but I’d like to see it a little less one-sided when it comes to who makes the sacrifices.

America really could be a light in the world if it really wanted to be; but sadly most Americans don’t give a shit and will vote their fears and prejudices. Does America have the courage to vote for real change? Sadly, I don’t think so.

Birthright

A friend of mine wants to get on the property ladder. She is currently renting a three bedroom house from her father, left to him by his late mother. She wishes to buy the property. It’s in a low-income, working class part of the city where crime and vandalism are fairly common. She wants to get a mortgage.

She was thinking of finding a house in another part of the city; a few miles away that has been developed and is more upwardly mobile. It would have cost her more to buy a property there, of course. In the end she decided to stay put. She knows the people in her small street and the price of buying a reasonably spacious house is within her means. But will it be a home or a millstone?

It seems to me that our birthright, our heritage is crippling debt. Get on the property ladder. Borrow hundreds of thousands and be tied to that lender for most of the rest of your life. Watch property prices fall with fear and trepidation. Oh no, another slump in the market!

My friend was upset a short while ago. She felt she hadn’t achieved anything in her thirty years of life. But she wasn’t talking about publishing a book or discovering something; she was talking about owning a house and getting married, followed as soon as possible by a baby.

So, this is my inheritance as a child of the West: debt, fear, and acquisition. You’d like to know which country I’m from? Sure, it’s the one with an ‘a’ in it.

But is the capitalist west worse than any other system in the world? No. There is no system of government or economics in the world that actually works.

Communism failed for very obvious reasons. It was run by human beings. It grew out of a sense of injustice and frustration; a few people had all the wealth and the majority lived in poor conditions. Hey Presto! Revolution! But, and this is a big but; there is always an aristocracy, even in socialism. The members of the party get better jobs and housing; there is always someone on top – the party chairman. The leader helps his friends and rewards those who are loyal to the ideals of the party. The party becomes god. Even when the system is clearly failing, the party faithful (and faithful is the right word) begin to silence decent. The system is now being protected from its own inevitable collapse. Religious faith is outlawed or strictly controlled because it teaches that god is above all things and the party is god. Believers are imprisoned and even executed. Anyone who speaks against the intolerance and absolute domination of the so-called democratic government are also imprisoned and tortured. Control must be maintained through whatever means are necessary.

So, the revolution that began out of a sense of injustice becomes a bigger monster than the one it attempted to slay.

We live in a fallen world and anything created by man is inherently corrupt. It may come out of the purest of intensions but it will soon become sullied and misshapen. We look to new leaders hoping that someone will lead us into a golden age only to be disappointed.

But am I downcast? Have I written off the human race or planet Earth? No. What I’ve come to realise is that systems and governments fail and dissolve; yet there is a lot of good in people. I can not change the world; but I can change the world around me. I can treat people with respect – Do unto others as I would have them do unto me. I can form relationships, friendships, and influence and be influenced.

We all can…

Food for Thought

In Short

You smile,
I’m elated;
You weep,
I’m devastated.